Chapter 60: Coming Clean
Chapter 60: Coming Clean
EMMA’s POV :
"Who is it?"Carrie asked when she noticed my phone buzzing for the tenth time that day.
lt was a Sunday afternoon and my friends and I were having our weekly Sunday brunch.
I slept all day yesterday because I was so tired after the dance, so I hadn't seen the two of them since prom night and we had a lot of catch up on.
"It's Tyler again.He wants to see me later tonight,"I sighed when I read the text on my phone.I had been dodging his calls and not responding to his texts.
We woke up after cuddling all night long in his dad's cabin and things went kinda awkward.
"So, is it official between you two?"Carrie asked and Tiff eyed me suspiciously.
"Guys, I told you, we're just friends,"
"Honey, friends don’t wander out to the beach at senior trip and fall asleep on each other's arms,"Tiff sassed.
"And don't forget prom night.We walked out to the living room in the morning and saw you two cuddling,"Carrie followed.
"I know,"
"And you said that you two kissed,"Carrie said again.
"Yeah, just that one time, and I stopped it,"
"So, this ship ain't sailing huh?"Tiff asked.
"There’s no ship guys...I really like Tyler, but..."
"Not the way you like lan,"Carrie said knowingly.
"Not even close,"I sighed, pausing for a moment before continuing
"And I know we're over and everything, but still.I can’t just magically make feelings appear,"
I It was sad to admit that even after all this time and my efforts in trying to forget him, I was still in love with lan Hayes.
I thought about him every single day and I dreamt about him every single night.
"So, what are you gonna do? Are you gonna see Ty later?"Tiff asked. © 2024 Nôv/el/Dram/a.Org.
"I don't know.I told him that I felt like leading him on but he said he didn't care,"
"But you do,"Carrie said.
"Yeah, I do care.I can't do that to him.He’s just too good,"
"You're a good friend too, Emma,"
Carrie took my hand and squeezed it gently.
"It just really sucks that I might have to break his heart.I know how that feels like and it is shitty as hell.So now we're just floating around, not sure of what we're doing,"
"You are preaching to the choir, sister,"Tiff sighed dramatically.
Tiff called us up last night and mentioned briefly that Nick and her are on a break.
She said she knew that Nick and her would have to break up eventually because they were going in different directions.
She just didn’t think it was gonna be this soon.
"So, things with you and Nick...?"I asked cautiously.
"Not great.I thought I'd at least have the summer together with him.But after prom night, he told me he’s going to take summer classes and leave in a couple of weeks.He’s gonna be in Austin for college and I’m gonna take a gap year traveling around Europe.We're both terrible at long distance relationships and commitment.It just felt like we're at the end of the rope.There’s nothing else we could do,"
Tiff was trying to appear strong when she explained everything, but I could tell she was broken up on the inside. "Aw, Tiff,"
I scooted closer to Tiff and gave her a hug.
"I know you really like him,"Carrie said.
"Yeah, but ‘like’ isn't gonna cut it anymore.He said we're too young for something too serious anyway.Maybe it’s just better off this way,"she shrugged bitterly.
"Do you agree with what he said?"I asked.
"I don’t know.Ask me again in a couple of weeks,"
"If you don’t agree with him, you should tell him,"
"I don’t know...I hate talking about these things, I don’t wanna sound clingy and stuff,"
"So what, you're just gonna ignore your feelings and go on about your life?"
I asked, and how ironic that I asked her that question.
I was guilty of doing the same thing.
"Yeah, wouldn't it be better to talk things out?"Carrie added.
"It’s not clingy to want clarity and closure, you know,"
"As much as it sucked to have a breakup and got your heart broken, at least the clarity was comforting.That last talk I had with lan was a good closure and it allowed me a chance at moving on,"
I said to Tiff.
This was true.
I tried to pretend like I got it all together and it was a bust.
All I did was lie to myself and my friends.
But the moment I had that talk with lan on the beach, I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
I came to accept the fact that we do love each other very much and it doesn’t mean that we have to be together.
"So, you're saying I should talk to Nick?"she asked.
"Yeah,"Carrie and I nodded in unison.
"Fine, I'll talk to Nick if...Emma will talk to Tyler!"
Tiff said suddenly.
"What? When did this become about me?"
"You're the one that said clarity and closure are good a thing.Come on, I'll do it if you do it,"
Tiff was looking at me with her best puppy dog eyes.
I knew I had to talk to Tyler eventually, but I didn’t think it was gonna be this soon.
But then again, there was no sense in prolonging things.
The sooner we pull this Band- Aid away, the sooner the wound could start to heal.
"Fine,"
I groaned finally and Tiff pulled me into a hug.
"Boys can come and go, but girlfriends are forever,"
After Sunday brunch, Carrie drove Tiff over to Nick's house.
Meanwhile, I stayed at the café and told Tyler to come meet me.
He arrived just as my friends were about to leave.
He greeted them cheerfully at the door, but Tiff and Carrie responded with a sorry hug.
That wasn't subtle at all.
With a confused look on his face, Tyler made his way over to me.
"Hey,"he said and sat on the chair in front of me.
"Hey,"
"Sorry I kept calling you.I just wanted to make sure you were okay.I had the worst hangover all day Saturday —"
"Tyler, we need to talk,"I cut him as he was rambling.Tyler saw the look on my face and let out a sigh.
"Uh-oh, here it comes,"he said.
"I'm being serious,"
"I know.I know what you’re gonna say, you don't have to say it,"he shook his head and leaned back on his chair.
"But I have to.I know it's not what you wanna hear, but it's gonna give you some closure,"I said as I reached for his hand.He let me held his hand and I squeezed it gently.I just hoped he could see that I wanted what was best for him.
I gave him a small smile and he let out another sigh.
"Alright, fine.Lay it on me,"he said finally.
"like you Tyler, but I don’t like you like that,"I paused for a moment before continuing,
"I know you said that it’s okay and we can take our time, but this isn’t something that we can force.I like you as a friend and I don’t want to get your hopes up and hurt you,"
"Wow, it’s like you've memorized that speech,"he stifled a bitter laugh.
"I may have written it on a napkin,"I smiled weakly.
He smiled weakly back and said, "So, you're saying...?"
"I think it’s best that we take some time apart,"
"We're not even dating and you're breaking up with me?"he was still trying to crack jokes even though his eyes were filled with hurt.
"Tyler,"I scolded.
"Just kidding.I know what you mean,"
he laughed drily and pulled his hand away, "It's gonna be tough, but I’ll get over it.No hard feelings.And maybe later we can all still hang out with the others, as friends,"
"Yeah, friends,"I nodded.
"Totally,"Tyler looked away for a while.
He was trying to gather his thoughts.He didn’t look angry or upset, he was handling things so maturely.
After a while of silence, he finally took a deep breath and turned back to me.
"Thanks for doing this.I guess I needed to hear that,"he said.
"Of course,"I replied.
"So, uh,"he paused for a beat before saying,
"The chicken sandwich here any good?"I stifled a laugh and said, "Not as good as Chick-fill-A, but still not bad,"
"That'll do,"he said and waved the waitress over.
We ended up staying there for the next hour.
Tyler was such a good sport, he didn't let things get too awkward between us.
We went on to talk about the prom, recapping everything from Maddie’s big news to Tiff being extra loud when she was humping Nick in Tyler’s dad's cabin.
"So, have you talked to that guy at all? Your ex?"
Tyler said suddenly.
He was munching on his chicken sandwich and I was drinking my milkshake.I almost spat the milkshake out when I heard his question.
"Uh, no,"I said and grabbed a napkin to wipe my mouth .
"Why?"
"It's clear that you still like this guy.Why don’t you just tell him?"
"It's...complicated,"
"Be careful with keeping your feelings bottled up, Em.I’m telling you this as a friend because I care about you, okay? I have no regrets telling you that I like you because I know I gave it my best shot.I’m never gonna regret that.Make sure you do the same thing too,"
His mouth was full of chicken sandwich as he spoke, but he spoke so eloquently.It was probably one of the best pieces of advice I had ever heard in my life.
"Thanks, Tyler,"I said.
After Tyler finished his chicken sandwich and I finished my milkshake, we decided to go our separate ways.
It was good to take some time apart and I wanted to let Tyler take his time and deal with his feelings.
Meanwhile, as I sat in my car in that café’s parking lot, I was forced to deal with my own feelings.
I couldn't stop thinking about what Tyler had told me earlier.
I wondered if I had given lan my best shot.
I wondered if I should meet him at least one last time.
I wondered if I would regret leaving town without saying anything else to him.
Graduation was next week and then I would never see him again... The thought of never seeing lan again hit me like a boulder to my stomach.
So what if he didn't think it mattered or if it wouldn't change anything, I deserved to have my feelings be known and understood.
Sure, this relationship was doomed from the start, but what we had was real and I would regret it if I left without even saying goodbye.
With that thought in mind, my hand furiously reached for my phone and typed the series of numbers my brain had memorized so well.
And I clicked the call button...