Life, Once Again

After Story 118

“We’re going to shoot from where you get kicked to where you get dragged out. Please just do it like before.”

The director didn’t give her any further instructions and returned to the monitor.

Haneul sat down under the roof after neatening her clothes. Jung Hyejung spoke from on top of the staircase,

“I will push you not so hard this time.”

“Please do it just like before. It really didn’t hurt at all. I think I can only do better if you do it like that.”

“Really? Then I’ll kick just a little harder than last time as a form of encouragement.” Hyejung pulled up her skirt and pretended to kick.

Haneul put on a smile when she saw the mischievous act. This senior was really kind, not ignoring the words of a minor actor.

“She was really good before. I was intimidated even though I was only watching from the side,” Nayeon said, stuck right next to Hyejung.

“Nayeon, you’re doing well too. It’s okay if you learn step by step, so you don’t need to feel hurried.”

“Thank you, ma’am. I really wouldn’t have been able to shoot this drama if it weren’t for you. So you have to keep looking after me, okay?”

“Okay, okay. I don’t have any power, but if there’s someone who says something bad to you, I’ll glare at that person from the side, okay?”

The two of them shared a warm conversation. Haneul lowered her head and giggled by herself. Nayeon’s actions were all cute. They could even be called deviously cute. She looked like a little girl trying to desperately cling to what she was holding in her hand. She would hide her devious tail in front of an elder and bare her fangs when up against someone she deemed ‘doable’. Even then, she stayed behind a line, never doing something that might come back to harm her later.

She could tell this much from the conversation they had earlier. She sneakily leaked what she wanted to happen and tried to pick Haneul’s nerve in a roundabout way. She was definitely well-educated in this regard.

The entertainment industry was no easy place, so she probably had to learn how to use her words to get out of difficult situations if she didn’t want adults to boss her around.

“Unni, please take good care of me.”

Nayeon raised her fist in front of her face and shouted ‘fighting’. Haneul smiled and nodded.

She was fine with everything else, whether it be acting cute in front of Hyejung to score points with her or giving that threat-like request so that her own skills wouldn’t be compared to that of a minor actor.

But unni? Unforgivable.

She had reached this place after going against all sorts of trials. Honestly, she had the confidence not to bat an eyelid even if someone died right in front of her eyes.

Thousands of times had she witnessed the death of her husband right in front of her eyes. And it was probably a dozen times more than that where she felt the despair of a life she could not save seeping away through her fingers.

The reason her mind, which should have been devastated to oblivion, was intact was either a result of her mentality becoming stronger than a diamond or that it was the last gift from god.

As such, it didn’t make sense that she was pissed while looking at the cute actions of a little girl who just turned twenty-three this year.

That’s supposed to be the case, but still, unni? Unforgivable.

Other people might say that she was childish for acting like that, but so what? She would rather listen to a barrage of insults to her face than listen to that sneaky ‘unni’.

No, that wasn’t right. Wasn’t twenty-three an age where she could be childish? Just like Nayeon in front of her, that is.

If she was going to live a life of enlightenment, away from worldly desires and the pleasures of the five senses, she would have either become a monk or just kept meditating at home.

However, she — as well as her husband — did not choose to live a life like that. They wanted a life so ordinary, nay, maybe a little special.

That was why they became actors. They chose to live a life true to their desires and were deeply engrossed in their greed.

If necessary, they would gladly endure everything, but if not, then they would vent it out, in a way that wouldn’t leave behind problems.

“We’re starting!”

She got into emotion after hearing the voice of the assistant director. She made eye contact with Nayeon, who was looking down at her from above the staircase.

She winked at her. At first, Nayeon made a confused expression before smiling. She also smiled back. She was told to do things moderately, so ‘moderately’ it would be.

“Action!”

Haneul flung herself backward after being hit by the foot that came right at her. She let the ground hold her body. Her elbows felt numb. It was pain that helped her set her emotions right.

If she brought the frustration from the unjust accusation to her chest level during the master shot, this time, she struggled to the point her vocal cords were overexerting.

Her eyes flipped and her body became cold as though all the blood had left her. The hem of the skirt in front of her was her only chance at survival. Should she miss this opportunity, she would be abandoned to wander in the wintry lands without anything on her.

She stomped her way forward on her knees. Her lips were trembling, and her fingers moved by themselves as though each joint had snapped.

She barely managed to put strength into her hands and grabbed the skirt. No, she hugged it.

“Mistress, please spare me. I was wrong. I was the bad woman.”

“Only now you confess your sins?”

“Yes, mistress. It is all my fault. So please, please spare me this once.”

She couldn’t hold back the shaking of her jaws. As a servant, being abandoned by the master meant death. She didn’t want to die. She had never stolen the hairpin, nor had she even looked at one, but she had to live first.

The foreboding sense of despair made her retch. She barely held it down and looked at her mistress. The mistress, who was looking down at her hand that was grabbing the skirt, clicked her tongue. That sounded like a thunderclap to her.

She started crying against her will. She grabbed onto the hem desperately and fell to the ground.

Two servants came over and grabbed her arms.

“Mistress, it wasn’t me. It wasn’t me!”

She twisted her body in resistance. She used her fingers to scratch the ground. She felt her fingernail crack at the tip, but it didn’t matter. If she couldn’t make it through this, she would be dead anyway. If she could buy empathy, a few fingernails was a cheap price to pay.

However, the mistress’ eyes had turned cold. There was no room for any empathy in her eyes. She cut off their relationship cleanly, just like a cook chopping off the head of a fish.

The moment she saw those eyes, her frustration turned to hatred.

There was no hope for survival, so only curses remained.

She struggled and screamed. She wanted to utter insults, but the sliver of reason she left within herself whispered to her that there was no swearing in the script.

The chilled body became hot as though she had a fever. She wrapped her arms around a pillar in the room before being dragged out the doors.

“Wow, you’re strong, young lady. You almost dragged me away instead.”

As soon as they left the frame of the camera, a minor actor playing the servant grumbled. The other minor actor also gasped.

The wrist she gripped onto had turned blue.

“Gee, you’re one tough lady. Look at this, isn’t this a bruise?”

Haneul neatened her messy clothes.

“I’m so sorry. I can only be satisfied if I do things properly when I need to. Did it hurt a lot?”

The two actors chimed in,

“Do it properly twice and I won’t have an arm left. Also, I thought you were really going to die. I was even wondering if you were sick somewhere.”

“Your acting is pretty ghastly alright. It’s not like you get paid more even if you do that, so let’s take things easy next time. Well, you are really good, but please take us into account next time.”

Haneul smiled and apologized again. The two minor actors also laughed it off.

“Nobody would’ve said anything even if you did it just like before. Why the sudden change in effort?” one of them asked.

Haneul stroked up the hair that covered her eyes.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

“Someone told me to do things moderately. So I did just that.”

Just then, a ‘cut’ could be heard inside the gates. She peeked inside to have a look at the situation. The actors were putting on their jackets and gathering in front of the monitor.

She made eye contact with Nayeon, who was walking towards the gates.

She waved her hand in the air and smiled brightly. Nayeon, who was watching her, twitched her mouth before turning around.

“What are you doing?” asked an actor next to her.

“I tried acting like a child. Acting immature is the best.”

Haneul chuckled while covering her mouth before coughing awkwardly to stop.

“Let’s wrap things up and go to the next part. Hurry up.”

It seemed that the shoot at the master house was done. The leader gathered all the minor actors in one spot.

“Good work today, everyone. Everyone other than the four men here can go home now. Returning the costumes is part of the work, so please put your mind to it. If there’s a problem with the clothing, tell the staff about it, if you don’t want to get contacted later about it. Especially over there.”

The leader pointed out Haneul specifically.

“If there’s a rip in the clothes, say it properly when you return it, okay?”

“Yes,” Haneul responded before looking at her clothes and skirt. There was some dirt on it, but no tears.

“Let’s finish up then. Everyone can go home unless you still haven’t written the journal yet.”

Haneul took out the pin that fixed her wig in place and took off the wig. When she placed her hand on the top of her head, she found it hot like a heater. Her body would probably turn cold in no time if she let things be.

She quickly ran to the bathroom. She changed her clothes and folded the traditional attire costume and put it between her arm and her body.

She came across Nayeon in front of the bathroom. Nayeon, wearing a black padded coat, came over in large strides.

“Unni! What was that for? You went too far.”

“Me? What did I do?”

“I told you that you can’t be acting like that. You really don’t know how dramas work. Look, no matter how much effort you put in, the one on camera is me. People watch the drama to watch me, not a minor actor like you, right?”

“Maybe.”

“So I told you to take hints, yet why did you do that? You were putting in even more effort than before.”

“More effort? No. I took things moderately. I’m not bleeding, I’m not hurt anywhere, and I don’t even have any bruises on me. I really took things safely so don’t worry.”

“Do you think I’m worried about you, unni? You really can’t read between the lines.”

“I’m actually quite good at it though. How strange.”

Nayeon sucked her lips inward and frowned. It seemed that she heard something from the director, or maybe nothing at all.

Perhaps he might have said that the minor actor was really good at acting, in response to which, Nayeon would have no choice but to agree.

She couldn’t help but chuckle when she imagined such a scene.

“UnnI! Are you laughing?”

“It’s funny though.”

Haha — she grabbed Nayeon’s shoulder and laughed. Nayeon’s nostrils became several times larger than normal. She snorted and looked around before putting her face up close.

“Unni, I’m the main character, okay?”

“Who told you otherwise? You are the main character alright. I won’t be appearing anymore from now on. So don’t act like a child and try your best. Well, I guess I acted like a child too.”

“Funny. Unni, you know you’re funny, right?”

Nayeon narrowed her eyes in a glare and frowned. At that time, Haneul found Jung Hyejung walking over to the bathroom.

“Miss Nayeon.”

“What is it? What!”

“Madam Jung is coming. Quickly act like you’re close to me.”

“Unni, I won’t fall for such a crude lie, you know?”

Hyejung was now right behind Nayeon. Haneul put on a warm smile and hooked arms with Nayeon.

Then she spoke,

“Don’t praise me too much. You’re much better than me, Miss Nayeon. But hey, you have a great personality. Celebrities are kinda hard to approach, but you are not like that. Oh, madam Jung.”

Haneul pulled Nayeon backward. Nayeon, who found Hyejung standing behind her, stiffened up before producing a cheerful voice.

“Madam.”

“What were you two doing?”

“I was just trying to learn acting from unni, so I rushed over.”

“How earnest of you. That’s right, that’s how you learn acting. Please understand Nayeon even if she bothers you. She’s just really passionate about acting.”

Haneul nodded. Hyejung walked past them and disappeared. Nayeon, who had her arm grabbed, spoke in a small voice,

“Why did you help me?”

“Then was I supposed to let her see you snapping out at me?”

“No! I don’t have that kind of image.”

“Exactly, that’s why I told you about it so that you can keep up that image.”

Haneul undid the lock on Nayeon’s arm.

“Go on then. I’m going to go home now. Good work today.”

She glanced at Nayeon, who was standing in a daze, before turning around.

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