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Thea

Sleep became a luxury to me because all I did was drown in my misery every night. Florentine would give me sedatives just so I could get some rest. My body rejected it because I’d be awake less than an hour.

Tonight, I decided to take a stroll to the one place I felt complete amidst all my suffering, the one place my baby had shared a lovely moment with it’s parents.

The night Angel and I kissed and he didn’t even know he was to be a father.

I stood over the short fence and just let the night’s breeze whisper to me.

Memories came flashing and it brought tears to my eyes. How did Angel and I get to this point? Our once loving selves reduced to nothing but hate. I loved him like I loved no other and he ended up being the one who hurt me the most.

I had so much grudge against him that I didn’t think anything could make me let go of it. I was broken and I was in need of healing.

I just wanted to know what hapiness felt like again.

While I dwelled in my thoughts I got startled by the sound of someone approaching behind me. I snapped towards the direction of the sound and was shocked to see Angel behind me, curiosity stealing his entire expression.Còntens bel0ngs to Nô(v)elDr/a/ma.Org

He was close enough that I wondered when he actually got here. I quickly wiped off the tears that stained my eyes and put up a hard front to face him.

“What are you doing here Thea.” He asked looking like he had some deep thoughts going on in his mind.

“I was just about to leave.” I said and tried to take a step forward but he blocked me.

My heart beat increased and I blinked nervously. What if he remembered what happened that night?

“I asked a question.” He said and the way he looked at me, I was certain he wasn’t going to let me go easily.

“Isn’t that obvious? I came to get some fresh air.”

He tilted his head looking at me with doubt. I couldn’t stand his gaze for long so I looked down.

“Why here of all places?” He continued and I raised my head to catch his gaze once again. My lips twitched as I thought of what to say.

“Because it’s nice.” I said failing to come up with a better excuse.

“Why did you cry then…?” He kept speaking in a calm yet suspicious tone. His eyes studied me keenly and I almost felt naked, that he could see through my lies.

“Do you have no conscience to ask me that? I won’t answer your questions anymore.” I said and tried to leave again but he blocked me, grabbing my wrist. I tried to pull away but he held me. I could tell he wasn’t using his full strength to hold me down. He finally let go of my hand.

“What’s your problem this time? Can’t you just let me be for once.” I said feeling tears log at the corners of my eyes but it wasn’t because I felt pestered but because the memories of that place hurt and now we were here again but this time, it was just the two of us.

Angel looked at me from eye to eye, I could tell he was searching for truth in there but I hoped he didn’t get any.

“It was you….” He said and my heart made a leap.

“What are you talking about?” I kept acting ignorant.

“We kissed, you’re the one I kissed Thea. It was you.” He declared boldly that I lost my confidence. I felt wordless as I kept parting and closing my lips while thinking of the perfect response. “You’re not denying it.” He continued and I knew I had to do something because his eyes were gleaming with hope now.

“Are you drunk?” I asked instead but regretted it the instant the words left my mouth. Our kiss was a result of him being drunk that night.

“I was, that night. I know how your lips taste Thea.” He said coming closer. I felt uncomfortable with it so I took a step back.

“You kissed someone? Here.” I said expressing my words with pain and a glint of doubt showed in his eyes before he waved it off.

“I won’t be deceived again Thea. You made me believe you weren’t the one when I asked you back at the warehouse but I can feel it in my soul that you’re the one I kissed that night.”

I sighed deeply and resumed my stance.

“You seem to be sharing kisses these days I see.” I mocked. “… But I don’t care who you fuck or who you kiss, all I want is for you to leave me the fuck alone!” I said angrily and he squinted at me looking confused.

He clenched his jaw, looking visibly hurt but I could careless as long as it shook his believe about kissing me that night.

“You really are good at acting.” He said and the tone in which he said it felt like it had a deeper meaning. He rubbed his jaw and sighed in frustration then he took another step towards me and I moved feeling nervous.

“Swear it that you weren’t here that night, that my lips didn’t feel yours. Swear it Thea and I’ll believe you.” He dared me. Lie I could but swear against the truth I didn’t see myself doing that instead I looked at him sternly without saying a word.

“It was you then.” He said sounding convinced. He also let out a sigh of relieve but I wasn’t letting him have a win. “Then why do you say you hate me if you could let me kiss you amidst the torture I melted on you?”

I bit my lip and folded my fist. He was right with the question, I asked myself that as well. Why did I let him kiss me that night despite how much he had made me suffer.

There was only one truth to it and it was because I loved him and deep down my heart I knew I still loved loved him like nothing had changed.

I hated myself for it. I deserved so much better.

“Tell me you don’t feel any thing for me even after you did that. You can’t say it?” He questioned amidst my silence. He looked hopeful but I was about to crash that hope. I took a bold step forward and looked him straight in the eye.

“You must have been really drunk to think that I’d let your lips come an inch to mine. I told you already Angel… I hate you to my core.” I said firmly and saw his eyes switch from certainty to surprise.

There was also a mix of pain to it and I knew I got him straight in the heart just like he deserved.

I saw he had been distablized by my words so I took the opportunity and walked away. My hands on my thumping chest. For a moment I almost got caught.