Chapter 17
Terra
The scent of woodsmoke and crisp night air welcomed ine as I slipped outside, escaping the estate’s suffocating press of old ghosts and memories. My nerves sang with relief feeling open sky above instead of brooding antique woodwork and cloying velvet drapes shrouding the corridors.
I sank gratefully onto the worn garden bench tucked against the rear veranda, angled to overlook the moonlit forest rolling unbroken to the distant sawtooth mountains.
Out here I could breathe. The stifling weight of the past eased just slightly under vast stars winking down as they had my very first night fleeing this place heartbroken so long ago. Their celestial light remained untroubled by earthly turmoil.
How foolish I had been, believing myself free of this to willingly walking back into the lion’s den. I should ha outlived my usefulness, he would discard me as coldly
ent. One imploring word from Nathan, and here I was again, wn his earnest vows were temporary manipulations. Once I Jefore. I was a born fool for trusting any word from his lying lips.
A crushing wave of anger and anguish welled up, forcing hot tears that I dashed away fiercely. Crying over Nathan yet again only proved how pathetically my traitorous heart still beat for the wolf who had crushed it to pulp. No matter how I steeled my will, fury powerless against this inescapable bond once forged between us by the moon goddess herself.
But this time, I refused to crumble meekly at his feet and beg for scraps of affection. I had built a full, happy life that belonged wholly to me, no longer some alpha royalty’s decorative trinket. The fierce independence I had clawed back from nothing meant more than any pretty words or promises.
Bootsteps scuffing the flagstones behind me made my shoulders tense instinctively. But I kept my voice cool as Nathan settled on the opposite end of the bench some distance away, intruding on my solitary peace yet again.
“Shouldn’t you be inside tending your father?” I remarked dismissively, still facing the serene forest vista. The needling jab fell beneath my dignity, but rationality stood little chance against the churning emotions his looming presence stirred up now.
“He sleeps well, finally. Your treatments have been miraculous.” Nathan’s fervent tone held no trace of my own bitterness.
Couldn’t he take a hint to leave me be? I bit back a scalding retort, still refusing to meet his emerald gaze head-on. Eye contact risked cracking my fragile composure. “Let’s hope your appreciations lasts longer than a moon’s turning this time,” 1 replied thinly.
Nathan flinched subtly at the venomous barb. But his voice remained infuriatingly earnest and calm. “Terra, you have every right to your resentment. But I swear to you, I fully understand now the magnitude of my mistakes.” He leaned forward imploringly. “Please, if you can just find any scrap of will to forgive-”
The careful facade of control snapped fully. I jerked toward Nathan, anger blazing wildly through any caution or weariness. “Forgive?” My harsh, mocking laugh echoed across the empty gardens. “As if your pretty apologies can undo the damage once the deed is done.”
Nathan’s chiseled features contorted, seeming genuinely wounded. But I refused softening. He deserved to finally feel a fraction of the hurt inflicted callously on me years ago.
When he reached for my rigid hand, eyes beseeching, I s**d it back as if scalded. “Do not touch me,” I hissed through clenched teeth. “Not unless you want me to remove that presumptuous paw.” To underscore the threat, my fingernails lengthened subtly into razor-sharp claws, pale in the moonlight.
Nathan froze, searching my face warily. I held his stare with vicious satisfaction, letting him glimpse just a sliver of the rage constantly simmering beneath my fragile outward calm. The venomous monster he had awoken could not be so easily subdued. He had broken this woman, and now the jagged shards would tear him b**dy in retaliation.~
*Forgiveness cannot be demanded or forced,” I continued scathingly. “Only earned through real change. And considering we sit here again despite harsh lessons once taught…” I trailed off pointedly.
When Nathan remained silent, I pushed myself to my feet, brushing off my skirts with jerky motions. A reckless urge to hurt and provoke him further goaded me despite all reason.
“In fact, since you seem to suffer memory lapses, let me make myself plain,” I goaded, leaning down toward Nathan with bared teeth. “Nothing could induce me to accept a place here again, least of all the company of a proven scoundrel and liar.”
With acidic satisfaction I watched the barb strike home, Nathan’s broad shoulders sagging under the weight of hatred. But an instant later he rallied, defiance glittering in his forest-colored eyes.
my unveiled
“Call me what names you wish,” he rumbled quietly. “The goddess herself bound us eternally. I have faith one day you will recognize that truth again.” His piercing gaze turned wretchedly hopeful. “This chill between us cannot endure forever.”
I reeled as though he had struck me a physical blow. How dare this arrogant beast fling our supposed sacred bond in my face after breaking me so cruelly? As if holy assignment could erase the damage once ruthlessly inflicted? My hand flew up cheek in a spray of blood.
without thought, whip-cracking across Nathan’s ch
“You made your choice long ago,” I snarled, anguished tears finally escaping down my flushed face, “Now live with the bitter fruits reaped from seeds sown in thoughtless haste.”
I spun away before Nathan could respond, fleeing into the yawning woods to outrun the tempest churning within. His stunned silhouette quickly disappeared behind the thick curtain of trees. But I could not escape the aching bond between us, throbbing relentlessly as I crashed heedlessly through the forest, wolf claws tearing brutally through underbrush.
I ran full out beneath the effusive moonlight until I thought my burning lungs might rupture, or my hammering heart c**k my ribs. Still the restless fury and pain churned on. At last I collapsed panting in a secluded glen, muscles quaking violently from overexertion.
If only physical collapse could also quiet my relentlessly whirling thoughts. Exhaustion slowly claimed my bruised and aching body. But even delirious with fatigue, my traitorous heart clung to fragile hopes kindled anew under. Nathan’s ardent gaze these past days together.
Much as I despised myself for it, perhaps a buried part of my spirit had recognized our fractured bond flaring potent as ever, despite all I sacrificed to leave the naive girl who loved him unquestioningly behind so long ago.
When silver light filtering down through rustling leaves finally woke me, I sat up with a groan, every inch of my battered
had body protesting. I felt even hollower and more unrested than before collapsing into dead slumber. But fiery anger burned out, leaving only an ashy weariness and lingering heartache in its wake.
Slowly I gathered the tattered remains of my dignity and shifted into human form, grimacing as dried blood and dirt flaked off torn skin already knitting itself back together. The evidence of my reckless rage made shame swarm hotly. Lashing out accomplished nothing worthwhile.
I must master my wayward temper, or risk weakening my own hard-won independence even further.This belongs to NôvelDrama.Org: ©.
Clean clothes awaited me in my meticulously prepared suite when I crept back inside just as rosy dawn blushed across the estate’s stony battlements.
The courtesy irked me further-I wanted no comforts or benevolence from Nathan’s hand. But after washing off grime and the last clinging tendrils of fury in a scalding shower, the soft warm bed was too tempting to resist collapsing into for a few fitful hours of rest.
“Hello, Dr Wolfe, sorry to disturb your period time.”
Kawoke to insistent knocking, followed by Derek’s rumbling voice announcing through the heavy oak door that the Alpha required my presence downstairs.
“Coming. Just a minute.” I bit back the caustic refusal poised on my tongue. Exchanging petty cruelties solved nothing. If I could behave civilly, Nathan,would have minimal excuses to prolong our acquaintance once I finished caring for his father.
The hulking beta’s shrewd gaze took in my wan, drawn appearance as I emerged. But he made no comment, merely gestured me politely toward the stairwell down to the great hall where Nathan waited.
I ignored my own haggard reflection in the gilt mirrors lining the elegant corridor. Appearances hardly signified between us anymore. All artifice had burned away, leaving only simmering bitterness and regret exposed.
Upon entering the imposing hall, my eyes fell immediately to the garish parallel scars slashing Nathan’s angular cheek, still raw and crimson. I froze, hit anew by the shameful reality of my own viciousness.
However justified my festering rage, succumbing to base violence made me no better than the cruelest alphas I had endured growing up powerless and vulnerable.