Chapter 51
I finally take Rune's hand and we join the others, then move as a group to the cliff's edge. Below us waves crash against the rocky coast, spraying sea mist into the air and creating a steady rhythm with the intervals of the break.
It's been a little over a week since I saved Rain from my mother. Since I became overwhelmed with magical powers that cause my skin to glow and silver streaks to run through my hair. Since I brought Darius back to life with my blood. Since my Nanny died. We've kept the bar closed in mourning, just as we did after my grandfather passed. But patrons have taken to slipping envelopes of cash under our door, with notes and cards. I've also found a casserole or dessert on the porch leading to my apartment nearly every day. My community has come together to take care of me and Morgan's Pub while I process my Nanny's death.
Now we stand at the cliff my mother leapt from, back when she was still good, before dark magic warped her perception of right and wrong. A tear rolls down my cheek as I think of how much her heart must have hurt, how broken she must have been to decide that the best thing for her child would be for her to take her own life.
But we're here for Tilly. As much as I hated losing my mother twice, saying goodbye to my Nanny is just as hard. I plant a kiss on the top of Rain's head, her cute little body strapped tightly against mine in her carrier. She won't have any memories of her great grandmother, but I'll see Nanny in everything my baby girl does, and Rain will have no question about where she inherited her greatness.
We stand a few feet back from the precipice, wind whipping through our hair, a steady stream of light coming from the moon. Hard to call this a funeral, but I feel it's the right service to honor Tilly and everything she meant to me.
Darius and Zev flank me and Rune stands just behind, his hands resting on my waist. Supported on all sides. It's so strange to stand with these princes and have an aura of calm about us. The Order members who posed a threat not that long ago are now just grateful the baby is alive and that I'm protected. Betty came to see me after I regained consciousness and made clear the misguided intentions were my mother's alone. After my final moments with Tilly and the magical stand off with my mom, I know she's telling the truth.
So now I have a moment to reflect and feel safe. And yet there's still an anxious knot in my stomach. I can't place the cause, but the feeling won't go away.
"I'm here! I got it!"
Our little ceremony has been waiting on one last guest, and we all turn to watch AJ bounding through the grass.
"I had to look through like six boxes before I found it," she says, handing me the final item we needed before this ceremony could get underway.
"That's fine, thank you so much for going back," I say. "I can't believe I forgot it."
"Yeah, it's not like you've got anything else on your mind," AJ jokes. "Vampire wound, killed your mom, skin freaking glows all the time."
I stifle a laugh. The "killed your mom" thing is almost off color, but that's how AJ rolls. Also, when you break it down, I did kill my mother, and I'd do it again if I had to.
I look down at the keepsake she brought, and my lip immediately starts to quiver and tears bubble up.
Nanny's old Red Sox hat.
Before she lost her mind, we'd watch
baseball together all the time, going down to Boston to watch the Red Sox and even driving up to Portland for mino league games. Nanny was a fanatic, though she wouldn't shout or cheer at the games; she'd just watch, her eyes wide, a constant smile on her face. It was like a kind of magic she couldn't understand, these men batting around and
chasing after this tiny orb.
After the incident, which I now see in a very different light, baseball was the one thing that could pull her through an episode. I always thought it was the boring commentary from the announcers, but it was something deeper. It was a peace she found in the skill and strategy, and watching the little ball take flight.
I don't have many other trinkets of
Nanny's, and I don't really feel a connection to her possessions. I truly do feet her inside my heart, a piece of her soul living inside mine flowing through the magic she
returned to my veins. So I'm going to throw this hat off the cliff and into the waters below, saying goodbye to the hardships Tilly endured while in her physical form, and turning the page on this chapter of her magical existence.
The princes each bring their own element to this goodbye ritual. I said they didn't need to make any grand gestures, but they clearly feel a
sense of gratitude for Tilly, as they
should Darius squeezes a
a drop of
blood into the hat, Zev adds a tuft of
hair, and Rune places a single leaf,
one from a tree in his homeland, he
says. Belongs to (N)ôvel/Drama.Org.
AJ pours in a shot of Powers Irish Whiskey, which was the first thing she got drunk on, stolen from our bar during a sleepover when she was 14. Tilly helped her through the hangover and never told her parents, something AJ has never forgotten. When everyone finishes their moment with the hat, I take it back and add one more thing. Her ashes. Finally, she will be free.
I walk it to the cliff's edge and conjure an image of my grandmother, of times I spent with her growing up. Of her smile. Of the love in her eyes. "Thanks for saving me, Nanny. Me and Rain."
I feel a slight ripple in my stomach, like the sensation when you're on a rollercoaster. It's just a little tickle from my Nanny and it makes me smile.
I throw the hat off the edge and watch as her ashes begin to glow as they are carried to sea by the wind. In the distance, I could swear I hear Nanny's laughter, like she's on a great adventure and enjoying every minute of it.